Wednesday, December 27, 2006

after thinking for a few days or even weeks. i finally decide to blog this down. my click. zapt. in darhs past. i used to think that the 4 of us would nebo be seperated. i olways treasure and remember all the things that happen during out "outings" and gatherings. especially Z. cox he trusted me and i trusted him. we shared alot of trouble and problems we had. i had so much fun with u guys. until recently. i came to realise that we all have drew apart. its not the one or two conversation we had already. its the one or two sentence we tok. even when we see each other. perhaps. in ni men derhs harts. zapt no longer exist. but frankly to me. i realli wanted this friendship so much. but guess. everything is too late. haishx. ya noe. i didnt regret knowing u guys. realli. i learned alot. thanks guys. guess. its the time for me to gib up. sayonara.

to Z: we used to be the best of budds. envy by loads. but recently. i came to reason the hatred u had to me. we are no longer like the past. u begins to have wary bout me. isit true? tats how i feels. it pointless for me to argue further more. becox i've grown. quarreling means nth anymore. perhaps 10 years down the road. when u see me on the street. say a HI to me. i will be so hapi.. but... haishx. no matter wad happen. hopes tat u will remember me. and frankly. i had nebo give up this friendship. though i duno wad happen. but. nvm. js remember. im ur marmi. forever.

to P: everything is useless now lerhs bwahs.. no use lerhs..

to T: thanks. for telling me all those. u make me realise u haven forget me. and im truely touched. but. guess. wo men. will remain as this situation bwahs. HI-BYE friends. for tat wads we are now. truely. sunzi. i still remember u. dun be mistaken. the whole conversation. dun push all the fault to Z although i wana tell him most of the things. but its becox. he is the one. tat hurts me the most. when i give up. cox. i dote on him. the MOST. bye sunzi...

guess now. i can onli use work to numb myself. im tired. realli beri tired. i dun wana give up. but i cant. who can i rely on? im at the weakest point of my life. now. feeling so damn down. aww~ i need a hug. and loads of love. to kip me going on. guess. i can onli find the teddy on my bed. my onli companion. =(

feeling rate....toopid. down. emo. sad. lonely. sians. feels so much like crying.
if 100% is elated. im feeling 10% onli. and the 10% is cox of UR existance. to give me reason to go on. haishx.

Written @11:37 PM